Great quotes #1
Submitted by: William
"If you ever see me getting beaten by the police, put down the video
camera and come help me."
"I've been doing the Fonda workout: the Peter Fonda workout. That's
where I wake up, take a hit of acid, smoke a joint, and run to my
sister's house and ask her for money."
"My mom said she learned how to swim. Someone took her out in the lake
and threw her off the boat. That's how she learned how to swim. I said,
'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.' "
"In elementary school, in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a
single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic? Do tall
people burn slower?"
"I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every
other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the
locks, they are always locking three."
"Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?"