FUNNY JOKES from Jokes Incorporated!
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FUNNY JOKES from Jokes Incorporated!
on At Work and Bored.com
Videos     Pics     Jokes


Thoughts for the Old

Submitted by: Marcus

I've sure gotten old. I've had 2 By-pass surgeries. A hip replacement, new knees. Fought prostate cancer, and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation, hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends.

But...Thank God, I still have my California driver's license!

A reporter interviewing a 104 year-old woman asks, "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" She replied, "No peer pressure."

The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.

Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?" "98," she replied. "Two years older than me." "So you're 96," the undertaker commented. She responded, "Hardly worth going home is it?"

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